Dear Daughters,
I bought you both a Christmas present the other night at the mall. Weird huh, I never go to the mall. I hate the mall; the fact that you have to drive around the parking lot for 5 minutes trying to find a spot up close, and end up parking a mile away anyway (slight exaggeration). It's always crowded and full of crazy people with spikey purple hair and tattoo covered bodies. They scare me. The others intimidate me; the rich folk who go to the mall in 3" high heeled boots and size 2 designer jeans with perfect hair and makeup.
Why did I stray from my 2 minute drive to Kohls with my reserved parking spot up front? Why did I leave behind my 20% off coupon and $10 Kohls cash? Why did I trade the comfort zone of the other housemoms who shop in their comfy shoes and drabby coats, whose hair, like mine, show signs of gray and their Christmas sweaters show signs of dinner? I blame it on your Dad. He asked if I wanted to go the mall with him, and since I never turn down an invitation to go shopping, even if it's at the mall, I said yes.
Why did Dad want to go to the mall? The man who hates crowds even more than I do? Let's just say, he's obsessed with finding the perfect christmas present for his mom, and because he's a good son, and I want Trey to model his father's example some day of someone who likes to make his mother happy, I dragged (drug?) Trey along.
We never did find the gift Dad was looking for, but as we were leaving, and almost to the door...they got me! You know who, the annoying Mall Kiosk salespeople. I had flashbacks of Jamaica, trying to get back to the bus at Dunn River Falls. The only trail back was right through the middle of the locals selling their wares. We hurried along, made no eye contact, but didn't quite escape before one guy got ahold of us, and before we knew what had happened, a tiki with our names carved into it was being shoved in our hands and an extraction of money from the other.
I guess I let down my guard, being so close to the door and all, I let my eyes stray for a split second on a young man holding something. And then to make matters worse, I answered him when he asked me a question! That was all the encouragement he needed. Before I knew what was happening, he was showing me his product and all the wonderful benefits and good things that would happen if I were to use it. It sounded great, felt great, looked great, how have I been living all these years without this wonderful product in my life...sold! Then he told me the price...not sold. Of course, that was the shocker sticker price, it's Christmas time, and because he was in such a good holiday mood, he would reduce the price for me, making it a 'extra good bargain'. Still too much for my budget.
I looked around for Tary, hoping for a little support. He would have put the guy in his place with an absolute NO. He's good at that kind of thing. He has no problem with that word, as I'm sure your aware of; which is why you always came to me when you wanted permission for something. Pushover must be written on my forehead or something, cuz others can spot that same weakness in me as well. Looking around for a little help and a little common sense, Tary was no where to be found. Sensing my hesitancy, the guy quickly followed up with the question, "Do you have a daughter?" "Yes", I replied meekly, hoping he wasn't going to ask for my first born as payment. "If you buy the first one, I'll let you have a second one for half off."
Now in my head I'm adding up the totals and dividing it by two, still a little too much. The guy was a professional, he knew how to wear me down. He leaned in a little closer and said almost in a whisper..."don't tell anyone, but this is what I'll do for you. If you buy these two, I'll throw in another one for free." Free! Now that's a word I can relate too! But before I could wipe my stupid smile off my face, he asked "would you like to pay for that with cash or credit". Crap, now what do I do? Again, I look around, this time to make sure Tary wasn't watching. "Don't worry Mom, Dad's getting his hearing checked." Trey is by my side. How long has he been there? How much did he hear? I looked down the aisle, sure enough, he's at the ClearSound hearing aide kiosk. I hope he does a better job of telling the salesgirl NO, otherwise our bank account will be in trouble. "That will be credit."
Before I could let my conscience kick in, I had the three items in my bag, one for Chelsea, one for Kayla, and one for Me! Only a slight twinge of shoppers remorse had begun to set in as I realized what a wimp I am for not being able to say NO. It wasn't a planned purchase, it wasn't even a need, it was a want. And up until 5 minutes ago it wasn't even something I knew I wanted. But I smiled as he handed me the receipt, saving the internal "I can't believe I just did that" conversation for later.
As he handed me the bag he asked me yet another question..."Do you like pearls?" "Um, yeah sure. I think they're pretty?" Not sure where this conversation was going...was he going to offer me a strand of pearls for free because I was so nice and purchased his product? Doubtful. I wasn't going to let him suck me in further, so I told him straight up, "It's just a luxury I can't afford." After a strange look he said, "Well, my friend here would like to show you what he has to offer."
Before I knew what was happening...again...there stood another gentlemen, trying to escort me to the kiosk close by. Good grief, enough is enough. I know I'm a pushover, but I'm no fool. While I quickly brushed him off with a "sorry, but I've really got to go. My husband is waiting for me, and I've just spent enough", I looked at his display and thought it was a little strange that I didn't see a single strand of pearls. Just a display of beauty products.
As we were walking away, Trey asked, "Mom, did that guy ask you if you liked pearls or curls?" Curls?! Is that what he asked? That would explain the curling irons. Well now I felt foolish.
I bought you both a Christmas present the other night at the mall. Weird huh, I never go to the mall. I hate the mall; the fact that you have to drive around the parking lot for 5 minutes trying to find a spot up close, and end up parking a mile away anyway (slight exaggeration). It's always crowded and full of crazy people with spikey purple hair and tattoo covered bodies. They scare me. The others intimidate me; the rich folk who go to the mall in 3" high heeled boots and size 2 designer jeans with perfect hair and makeup.
Why did I stray from my 2 minute drive to Kohls with my reserved parking spot up front? Why did I leave behind my 20% off coupon and $10 Kohls cash? Why did I trade the comfort zone of the other housemoms who shop in their comfy shoes and drabby coats, whose hair, like mine, show signs of gray and their Christmas sweaters show signs of dinner? I blame it on your Dad. He asked if I wanted to go the mall with him, and since I never turn down an invitation to go shopping, even if it's at the mall, I said yes.
Why did Dad want to go to the mall? The man who hates crowds even more than I do? Let's just say, he's obsessed with finding the perfect christmas present for his mom, and because he's a good son, and I want Trey to model his father's example some day of someone who likes to make his mother happy, I dragged (drug?) Trey along.
We never did find the gift Dad was looking for, but as we were leaving, and almost to the door...they got me! You know who, the annoying Mall Kiosk salespeople. I had flashbacks of Jamaica, trying to get back to the bus at Dunn River Falls. The only trail back was right through the middle of the locals selling their wares. We hurried along, made no eye contact, but didn't quite escape before one guy got ahold of us, and before we knew what had happened, a tiki with our names carved into it was being shoved in our hands and an extraction of money from the other.
I guess I let down my guard, being so close to the door and all, I let my eyes stray for a split second on a young man holding something. And then to make matters worse, I answered him when he asked me a question! That was all the encouragement he needed. Before I knew what was happening, he was showing me his product and all the wonderful benefits and good things that would happen if I were to use it. It sounded great, felt great, looked great, how have I been living all these years without this wonderful product in my life...sold! Then he told me the price...not sold. Of course, that was the shocker sticker price, it's Christmas time, and because he was in such a good holiday mood, he would reduce the price for me, making it a 'extra good bargain'. Still too much for my budget.
I looked around for Tary, hoping for a little support. He would have put the guy in his place with an absolute NO. He's good at that kind of thing. He has no problem with that word, as I'm sure your aware of; which is why you always came to me when you wanted permission for something. Pushover must be written on my forehead or something, cuz others can spot that same weakness in me as well. Looking around for a little help and a little common sense, Tary was no where to be found. Sensing my hesitancy, the guy quickly followed up with the question, "Do you have a daughter?" "Yes", I replied meekly, hoping he wasn't going to ask for my first born as payment. "If you buy the first one, I'll let you have a second one for half off."
Now in my head I'm adding up the totals and dividing it by two, still a little too much. The guy was a professional, he knew how to wear me down. He leaned in a little closer and said almost in a whisper..."don't tell anyone, but this is what I'll do for you. If you buy these two, I'll throw in another one for free." Free! Now that's a word I can relate too! But before I could wipe my stupid smile off my face, he asked "would you like to pay for that with cash or credit". Crap, now what do I do? Again, I look around, this time to make sure Tary wasn't watching. "Don't worry Mom, Dad's getting his hearing checked." Trey is by my side. How long has he been there? How much did he hear? I looked down the aisle, sure enough, he's at the ClearSound hearing aide kiosk. I hope he does a better job of telling the salesgirl NO, otherwise our bank account will be in trouble. "That will be credit."
Before I could let my conscience kick in, I had the three items in my bag, one for Chelsea, one for Kayla, and one for Me! Only a slight twinge of shoppers remorse had begun to set in as I realized what a wimp I am for not being able to say NO. It wasn't a planned purchase, it wasn't even a need, it was a want. And up until 5 minutes ago it wasn't even something I knew I wanted. But I smiled as he handed me the receipt, saving the internal "I can't believe I just did that" conversation for later.
As he handed me the bag he asked me yet another question..."Do you like pearls?" "Um, yeah sure. I think they're pretty?" Not sure where this conversation was going...was he going to offer me a strand of pearls for free because I was so nice and purchased his product? Doubtful. I wasn't going to let him suck me in further, so I told him straight up, "It's just a luxury I can't afford." After a strange look he said, "Well, my friend here would like to show you what he has to offer."
Before I knew what was happening...again...there stood another gentlemen, trying to escort me to the kiosk close by. Good grief, enough is enough. I know I'm a pushover, but I'm no fool. While I quickly brushed him off with a "sorry, but I've really got to go. My husband is waiting for me, and I've just spent enough", I looked at his display and thought it was a little strange that I didn't see a single strand of pearls. Just a display of beauty products.
As we were walking away, Trey asked, "Mom, did that guy ask you if you liked pearls or curls?" Curls?! Is that what he asked? That would explain the curling irons. Well now I felt foolish.
Maybe I should get my hearing checked.
On second thought, better not. I don't think I could afford it.
On second thought, better not. I don't think I could afford it.
