Fathers...in heaven

I'm writing this post pre-makeup.

It's a bitter-sweet Fathers Day. Sweet for those of us who still have our fathers with us, so we can shower them with hugs and kisses, hand-made cards and a big breakfast in bed.

Bitter for those whose fathers have been called home prematurely, and they're not able to wrap their arms around them and express how much they love and appreciate them. Wishing and hoping that they showed and told their fathers enough while they were here, knowing they passed on with knowledge of the love they left behind.

Friday night, my dear sweet son in law, lost his father to a tragic accident. Oddly enough, it was the second time in his life that he lost his father. The first time, he came back. This time, he did not. The first time he was given an extension on his life to return and see his children raised. This time, he will anxiously await with his grandchildren in heaven for their time on earth, and watch them grow from above. The first time, he came back to earth a changed man. This time, we have all been changed.

Dale was a great man. I didn't know him before his accident 15 years ago, so I don't know how he was before, I only know how he was now. He was the kind of guy who would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it, and he would give it to you before you even asked. He was faithful in his church callings, always where he should be to lend a hand. When he spoke, he used the same tone that a mother uses when she calms her little one. His voice was always so soft and caring I almost expected the conversation to end with a pat on the head.

His accident years ago left him with a brain injury that took away parts of his personality. His sense of humor was never quite the same. He always seemed so serious, and in a family where joking and laughing was a way for them to stay sane, at times the humor was lost on Dale and he wouldn't take too kindly to the laughter. Prayer and scripture time, when all should be serious and reflective, at times would take a wrong turn somewhere. Often, while reading scriptures, they would play "Popcorn", where they take turns reading, and mid-sentence can shout out someone else's name to pick up where they left off. This meant you had to be paying attention and reading along. One night they were reading in Alma, the wars were raging between the Nephi's and Lamanites, Nathan was reading..."And it came to pass that the soldier who stood by, who smote off the scalp of" MOM! Everyone started laughing, but Dale didn't find that one bit funny. Often at prayertime, someone, probably Joe, would say some offhand remark that would get them all giggling. No one would be composed enough to pray, except for Dale. He would sit with his arms quietly folded, scolding them, because nothing is funny about prayer.
I'm sure there are a hundred more stories that could be told. Each of them funny in their own "I can't believe he did that" way, just ask the fire department.

In life, he taught them patience and long suffering.

In death, he taught us about hope and charity.

In perspective, we've all learned that life is too short and we never know when it will be our time to return home.

After the media died down, the police and firemen left, the bystanders walked away. Those of us left behind, returned to our homes with our husbands and fathers by our side, and gave them an extra hug, expressed our love and appreciation for them, and shed another tear for those who will be missing their fathers more than ever this Fathers Day.

To my own Father, I love you...I love you...I love you! Thank you for your example, your unconditional love, and for your presence in my life.

To my Husband, I love you...I love you...I love you! Thank you for being the wonderful father that you are to our children. For your example, your service, your love and kindness that you show me, and the children. Most of all, thank you for your presence in my life.

To my Son-in-law Joe, the father of my soon-to-be grandchild, I love you...I love you...I love you! Thank you for loving my daughter the way you do. For your patience and kindness and gentle spirit. I know you're going to make a wonderful father...

...you had a great example.

Thank you Dale! We will miss you, but your influence and legacy will carry on.